| (no subject) |
[Jun. 26th, 2009|12:44 pm] |
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I enjoy the juxtaposition of thousands of fans outside a hospital with rest in peace signs... |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 9th, 2009|06:24 am] |
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On the cover of People, Bristol Palin refers to her child as a consequence... |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 25th, 2009|09:46 pm] |
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I now own a shamwow...Somebody needs to put me to bed at night.. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 17th, 2009|08:00 pm] |
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sometimes I like to use my phone to make and receive calls.. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 28th, 2009|07:24 am] |
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I went grocery shopping last week...the next day I went to the doctor and he told me I'm not allowed to eat any more salt...now I have to get rid of all my groceries.. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 21st, 2009|09:15 pm] |
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On Hannity tonight Dick Cheney referred to water boarding and other forms of torture as "asking tough questions"... |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 17th, 2009|06:29 pm] |
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I always get complemented on the veins on my arm whenever I give blood, or get lab work done, or inject drugs... |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 7th, 2009|09:13 pm] |
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I was browsing the bulletin board at the grocery when I came across this gem: "UEGENT wanted: adult diapers" |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 4th, 2009|10:23 pm] |
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I was walking through my neighborhood and saw that somebody threw a used pregnancy test on the ground. Looks like I'm getting a new neighbor in a few months... |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 1st, 2009|07:34 am] |
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My mom bought me a snuggie.. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 17th, 2009|05:56 pm] |
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Just because my last name vaguely sounds like limerick doesn't mean I'm Irish. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 12th, 2009|04:31 pm] |
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Today was the last day of the term before final's week, so I received two doughnuts, a Hershey's bar, an apple, and a box of cookies from various students. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 7th, 2009|04:46 pm] |
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According to imdb, if you liked Rocky Horror, you might also like The Notebook. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 28th, 2009|04:42 pm] |
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I was using the self check out lane to buy a tomato this afternoon. While searching for the product the produce screen had a button for fruit and one for vegetables...fuck... |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 27th, 2009|07:42 pm] |
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there was a guy wearing a backpack at the gym tonight working out... |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 25th, 2009|08:15 pm] |
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Why at every fast food restaurant are there two townies hanging out at the counter hitting on the cashier? |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 1st, 2009|07:25 pm] |
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a black coach has now beat a white coach... |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 30th, 2009|01:37 pm] |
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one of the featured links on msn.com today is a link to play solitaire online...do computers no longer come with solitaire? |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 28th, 2009|07:22 am] |
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Rite Aid never has a premier parking spot... |
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